Plastic Surgery Disasters lyrics

Dog bite
On my leg
Not right
Supposed to beg
Daily to the filling station
Underwater navigation

Oh
Oh
Oh

Last call for alcohol.
Last call for your freedom of speech.
Drink up. Happy hour is now enforced by law.
Don't forget our house special, it's called a Trickie Dickie Screwdriver.
It's got one part Jack Daniels, two parts purple Kool-Aid,
and a jigger of formaldehyde
from the jar with Hitler's brain in it we got in the back storeroom.
Happy trails to you. Happy trails to you.

Punk ain't no religious cult
Punk means thinking for yourself
You ain't hardcore cos you spike your hair
When a jock still lives inside your head

Nazi punks
Nazi punks
Nazi punks-Fuck Off!

Nazi punks
Nazi punks
Nazi punks-Fuck Off!

If you've come to fight, get outa here
You ain't no better than the bouncers
We ain't trying to be police
When you ape the cops it ain't anarchy

God damn, well let's do a tune called Rawhide, okay
God damn tape's rollin', let's go

Let's move 'em out
1, 2, 3, 4

Rolin' rollin' rollin'
Rolin' rollin' rollin'
Rolin' rollin' rollin'
Rolin' rollin' rollin'
Keep rollin' rollin' rollin'
Though the streams are swollen
Keep them dogies rollin'
Keep them dogies rollin'
Keep them dogies rollin'

Rawhide
Don't try to understand them

Once I had a close friend
I knew him for quite a while
He seemed alright to me
We had this deal together
Tied up my money and time
And then he went away
Taking all that was mine

[Chorus]
Oh, well, things crumble to an end
Hell, we all die in the end
Die in the end

Once it was fun to worry
About who was in control
Could look into the future
But now it don't seem right

[Chorus]
All religions make me wanna throw up
All religions make me sick
All religions make me wanna throw up
All religions suck
They all claim that they have the truth
That'll set you free
Just give 'em all your money and they'll set you free
Free for a fee

They all claim that they have 'the Answer'
When they don't even know the Question
They're just a bunch of liars
They just want your money

I'm tired of kissin' ass
I can't sit still all day
You know I know your school's a lie
That's why you dragged me here

'You're a hyperactve child
You're disruptive, you're too wild
We're going to calm you down
Now this won't hurt a bit'

Drag me to the floor
Pullin' down my pants
Ram a needle up my butt
Put my brain into a trance

'No more hyperactive child
Got too much of a mind

I am your plumber
No I never went away
I still bug your bedrooms
And pick up everything you say
It can be a boring job
To moniter all day your excess talk

I hear when you're drinking
And cheating on your lonely wife
I play tape recordings
Of you to my friends at night

We've got our girl in bed with you
You're on candid camera
We just un-elected you

[Chorus]
I am the owl
I seek out the foul

The crowded future stings my eyes
I still find time to exercise
In uniform with two white stripes

Unlock my section of the sand
It's fenced off to the water's edge
I clamp a gasmask on my head

[Chorus]
On my beach at night
Bathe in my moonlight

Another tanker's hit the rocks
Abandoned to spill out its guts
The sand is laced with sticky glops

O' Shimmering moonlight sheen upon

You call yourself the Moral Majority
We call ourselves the people in the real world
Trying to rub us out, but we're going to survive
God must be dead if you're alive

You say, 'God loves you. Come and buy the Good News'
Then you buy the president and swimming pools
If Jesus don't save 'til we're lining your pockets
God must be dead if you're alive

Circus-tent con-men and Southern belle bunnies

I finally found a job in a paper
Movin' barrels at a chemical plant
There's shiny-looking dust on my fingers
Goin' up my nose and into my lungs

It's the Kepone poisoning-Minamata
Kepone poisoning-Minamata
At the grimy Kepone Factory
Turning people into bonzai trees

Now I've got these splitting headaches
I can't quite get it up no more
I can't sleep and it's driving me crazy

Buzzbomb buzzbomb macho-mobile
The road's my slave, that's how I feel
I cruise alone, I cruise real far
Shoo young punk! I love my car

Cross Nevada at a 110
Highway 50 and there's nobody there
Sign says, 'Next sign 30 miles!'…

My pension comes—
Each penny saved buys more escape from home
I'd rather carouse around all day
Than move into a home

Plow through rest area San-o-Lets

So it's Halloween
And you feel like dancin'
And you feel like shinin'
And you feel like letting loose

Whatcha gonna be
Babe, you better know
And you better plan
Better plan all day

Better plan all week
Better plan all month
Better plan all year

You're dressed up like a clown
Putting on your act
It's the only time all year
You'll ever admit that

I can see your eyes
I can see your brain

Rioting-the unbeatable high
Adrenalin shoots your nerves to the sky
Everyone knows this town is gonna blow
And it's all gonna blow right now:.

Now you can smash all the windows that you want
All you really need are some friends and a rock
Throwing a brick never felt so damn good
Smash more glass
Scream with a laugh
And wallow with the crowds
Watch them kicking peoples' ass

No junk food, just earthly goods
I ate weird berries in the woods
Now I'm seeing colors, I'm getting higher
I think I'll start a forest fire

There's a forest fire climbin the hill
Burning wealthy California homes
Better run run run run run run
From the fire

But some of us stay and watch
And we think of your insurance costs
And we laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh
At your lives

Roughin' it in the great outdoors
Guidebooks tell us where to go
Winnebago Warrior

Slow down traffic climbing hills
30 gallons to the mile
Honey, quick, the polaroid

[Chorus]
Winnebago Warrior
Brave as old John Wayne
Winnebago Warrior
A true yankee pioneer

Stop at Stuckey's for a meal
Blab all day on the CB
Winnebago Warrior

Littered campgrounds, folding chairs
Feed Doritos to the bears

You've been hanging 'round
With an enemy of the state
Come with me to the building
That no-one stops to watch

[Chorus]
C'mon bleed
C'mon bleed
C'mon bleed
Bleed for me

We'll strap you to a pipe
Electrodes on your balls
C'mon scream
C'mon writhe
Face down in a pool of piss

[Chorus]

In the name of world peace
In the name of world profits
America pumps up our secret police
America wants fuel

We got a drug
We're gonna try it out on you
Won't make you die
It'll getcha just a little bit sick

[Chorus]
Got a head cold
Got a chest cold
And it's three days old
(Goin' on forever)
Make you hazy
Make you lazy
Drive you crazy
For days and days and days and days and days
And years

Barely got the time now
To stay on the job
Double up the dosage in your water supply

TV invents a disease
You think you have
So you buy our drugs
And soon you depend on them
Pain is in your mind
Gotcha comin' back for more
Again and again and again and again
Gonna rip you off
Rip you off

Doctor says you need surgery now
Feelin' good 'til the side effects
Fuck up something else
You're ensnared by the medicine man
Paying up the ass
Again and again
Gonna rip you off

I go to college
That makes me so cool
I live in a dorm
And show off by the pool

I join the right clubs
Just to build an impression
I block out thinking
It won't get me ahead

My ambition in life
Is to look good on paper
All I want is a slot
In some big corporation

John Belushi's my hero
I lampoon and I ape him
My news of the world
Comes from Sports Illustrated

I'm proud of my trophies

You're a well paid scientist
You only talk in facts
You know you're always right
'Cause you know how to prove it step by step

A PhD to show you're smart
With textbook formulas
But you're used up
Just like a factory hand

Something is wrong here
You won't find in on a shelf
You're well paid
You're well trained
You're tied to a rack

Company cocktails-gotta go
Say the right thing