Not So Soft lyrics

You are subtle as a window pane
Standing in my view
But I will wait for it to rain
So that I can see you
You call me up at night
When there's no light passing through
And you think that I don't understand
But I do

We don't say everything that we could
So that we can say later
Oh, you misunderstood
I hold my cards up
Close to my chest
I say what I have to
And I hold back the rest

Tending the garden of noise
When I grow the traffic
And the churchbells
And the neighborhood boys
Singing to myself
As the solitude sets in
In tune with the symphony of South Brooklyn
I sing

Rockabye, rockabye baby
Rockabye, the baby that is me
Rockabye, rockabye baby
Rockabye til I'm fast asleep

The tunnel is train torn
The tracks are worn and sore
I can feel the rattle

She says forget what you have to do
Pretend there is nothing
Outside this room
And like an idea she came to me
But she came too late
Or maybe too soon
I said please try not to love me
Close your eyes, I'm turning on the light
You know I have no vacancy
And it's awfully cold outside tonight

The rain stains the brick a darker red
Slowly I'm rolling out of her bed

I'm gonna turn and walk away
You can wait
Til I am far along
Then run and come
And catch my arm
And say you'd die
If I were gone
I want to hear you call my name
It's too easy
Just to say it soft
I don't like my language watered down
I don't like my edges rounded off

I can't always wait
For your circumstance to improve
Love is loose it shifts each time you move

Death has been your lover
He has brought you
The edges of your life
And now you are looking over
And all we can say is
It's gonna be all right
And I am looking forward to looking back on these days
When on every corner
Someone holds a sign
That says I'm homeless
I'm hungry and
I have AIDS

How will they define our generation in the coming decades

She was shaking and talking
Louder and louder
Each sentence was sifted to a very fine powder
Her face was wet and tight
Her grip was cold and light
A strong wind could blow you down
I heard myself say
Word up sister
A strong wind could take me away

I said how long have
You been at large
They told me you were stashed
Last time I asked
She said I've been out now

In a forest of stone
Underneath the corporate canopy
Where the sun rarely filters down
The ground is not so soft
Not so soft

They build buildings to house people
Making money
Or they build buildings to make money
Off of housing people
It's true
Like a lot of things are true
I am foraging for a phone booth on the forest floor
That is not so soft
I look up

She says my ass hurts
When I sit down
She says my feet hurt
From just standing around
I think my body is as restless as my mind
And I don't know if I can roll with it this time

Packed his uniforms
And drove him to the base
She was crying all the way
The world looked her in the face
And said
Roll with it, baby
Make it your career
Keep the home fires burning

I am evening the score
I am cutting the umbilical cord
Curled with my teeth against my knees
I am scratching at my consciousness
Like a bitch with fleas
I think you'll be greatly pleased
To learn that yours was the hardest itch to relieve

This is me
Without my hair
Welcome to my open stare
I got nothing to hide no more
Why disguise what isn't there
I am an eyesore
I am a detour

Thank you for letting me stay here
Thank you for taking me in
Thank you for the beer and the food
Thank you for loaning me bus fare
Thank you for showing me around
That was a very kind thing to do
Thank you for the use of the clean towel
Thank you for half of your bed
We can sleep here like brother and sister, you said

But you changed the rules in an hour or two

We can touch
Touch our girl cheeks
And we can hold hands
Like paper dolls
We can try
Try each other on
In the privacy
Within New York City's walls
We can kiss
Kiss goodnight
And we can go home wondering
What would it be like if
If I did not have a boyfriend
We could spend the whole night

I am waking up in her bed
I sing 1st avenue
The open window said
Always late to sleep

Hello
It's me
I'm returning your call
It's Monday Wednesday Friday
Between noon and three
He says I usually just let the phone ring
But I've always got a minute of time
For the next big thing

And I wonder
How can he see where he's going
With those dollar signs in front of his eyes?
I say thank you for your interest
But my thing is already just the right size

Hello

I am looking for the holes
The holes in your jeans
Because I want to know
Are they worn out in the seat
Or are they worn out in the knees

There are so many ways to wear
What we've got before it's gone
To make use of what is there
I don't wear anything I can't wipe my hands on

Do your policies fit between the headlines
Are they written in newsprint, are they distant

She sat there like a photograph of someone much further away
We shared a brief bus stop
On one of those inbetween days
She gave me her smile
And I looked underneath at the lipstick on her teeth

She asked me for a light
And if I thought her hair looked okay
We grew out of the small talk
Into stuff strangers just don't say
We discovered we are both
Pleasantly furious half of the time

she sat there like a photograph
of someone much further away
we shared a brief bus stop
on one of those in-between days
she gave me her smile
and i looked underneath
at the lipstick on her teeth

she asked me for a light
and if i thought her hair looked okay
we grew out of the small talk
into stuff strangers just don't say
we discovered we are both
pleasantly furious half of the time