I was sitting and awaiting
Just thinking, contemplating my life when I heard the phone
I picked up the receiver
And I did not believe her
When I heard a voice say you're not alone

[chorus:]
When I am down and I am blue
All I have to do
Is close my eyes and think of you
And the world is new

Life was getting hectic
And things were unexpected
When I first received your call

I never told you how to live your life
I never said you had to be something you don't want to be
I never said you had to stick around forever
Never said you had to stick around to be with me

[Chorus]:
I ain't going to be responsible
When your life don't end up full
All your talk has become bull
Just what do you see
Don't place the blame on me

Just the other day
I was walking by myself
Little kids at play
Old man talking to himself
I went outside to get a drink
Sat down by the door to think
Out of the corner of my eye
Caught a glimpse of the superspy
When he saw me look his way
He jumped down that alley way

Then I saw that man
In his black suit and cadillac
Suckin' on a lollipop

Next night I went on a date
Runnin' to the movies late

I wrote this song for you to say i'm sorry
I know that I was wrong and you don't like me
Why, why, why
Must you feel this way
I wish I had the words
I needed to say

[chorus:]
'Cause you and me
We disagree
On everything and everyone
I only want to be your friend again

I hear you're blaming me for all your problems
Well if you'd quit complaining you might solve 'em
I'll try hard to make amends

[chorus:]
Spam
It's pink and it's oval
Spam
I buy it at the Mobil
Spam
It's made in Chernobyl
Spam

Now when I was a child
My family was so poor
They didn't have the finer things in life to eat
So we had a plan
In a big blue can
The government substitute for meat

[repeat chorus]

To get me to eat it at dinner
They said I'd grow up like Bruce Jenner
He was a winner that never knew defeat

Baby I use to think I loved you so
But now I met someone new and I really just don’t know
And I’ve tried to let you know just how I feel
But somehow my emotions mixed up what was fake and real

[chorus]:
Cause you and me
We used to be so good
And things don’t seem to be just like they should
And I would never try to hurt you so

The other night I tried to go to a show
But the man at the door
He told me no
He said, "No one under 21 allowed"
But he must have been stupid 'cause I saw my friends in the crowd
He said, "You can't buy an alcoholic drink"
"So we don't care what you really think"

[chorus:]
Why's this happened to me
And the show was for free
It sucks to be
Under 21

So I went and got myself a plan that would work